Beauty Is in the Eye of the Beholder
Did I have flaws? Absolutely. We all do. But I realized it felt dismissive to assume they were purely negative. I could see myself as simply impulsive and reckless – but no, I was also brave and spontaneous. I’ve been able to make snap decisions throughout my life that would terrify some people, decisions with consequences (both bad and good) that have made me stronger and wiser in the end.
Instead of feeling flighty and immature, I saw the almost childlike wonder with which I perceived the world around me, the same wonder that gave me the ability to see breathtaking beauty in mundane objects and experiences. My constant awe at the world around me inspires me to imagine and create. I notice tiny details others don’t, or simply see my surroundings in strange and different ways that inform my artistic style and drive me to express my unusual vision.
I’ve always struggled with seeing projects through to completion. I’m far more accomplished at starting things than I am at finishing them, and I’ve taken a fair amount of criticism for my seeming inability to reach the finish line, but was that really always a bad trait? I noticed that in the process of beginning my various endeavors I’ve picked up so many skills that I never would have learned otherwise. I’ve tried silk paper-making, spinning (yarn, not cycling), typography, website design, metalsmithing, screen printing, translation, and so much more.
Without this odd set of skills, the result of so many halfhearted beginnings, I wouldn’t have been uniquely positioned to start the business I run today. And now that I’m pretty stable, I’m also in a good place to see many of my projects through to fruition (and to recognize which ones should be abandoned early on, and there’s no shame in knowing that).
This is the symbiosis I see; every disadvantage has its advantage, every cloud its silver lining. Perhaps I am infected by something, but the symptoms of my disease are also the traits that make me strong, smart, creative, spontaneous, caring, and brave.
